The Peter Dutton led Coalition, spurred on by Donald Trump’s US election win, have started their Australian election campaign early by employing focus groups to help them decide which minority group it should accuse of eating cats and dogs. ”Donald... Read More ›
Newspoll
Opposition leader and Australia’s next Prime Minister according to Sky News, Peter Dutton, has celebrated the news that he has risen in the polls by indulging in his favourite hobby of strangling puppies. ”As a politician you work hard and... Read More ›
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has celebrated his success over the weekend in overtaking Prime Minister Anthony Albanese in the polls by heading to his local pet store and strangling a basket of puppies. ”It’s important that we don’t just dwell... Read More ›
The Opposition’s leading proponent of numerology, Sussan Ley, is speculated to this week be considering mounting a challenge to leader Peter Dutton, following the weekends dire polling results for the Coalition. ”We thought with the media going to town and... Read More ›
Opposition leader, the Dark Lord Peter Dutton, has spent the day seething after learning that Cumberland city council had stolen his idea to start banning LGBTQIA+ based books in the local library. ”Peter is not a happy man at the... Read More ›
A rise in the polls for Opposition leader Peter Dutton has forced the country to rethink what it would be like should the member for Dixon were to become Prime Minister. For his colleague, the former deputy Prime Minister Barnaby... Read More ›
Opposition leader, the Dark Lord Peter Dutton, has demanded that tax payers pony up more cash so he can continue to head overseas on his little jaunts, like the one he is currently on in India. “Peter is doing great... Read More ›
Low rating news and opinion channel Sky News Australia have declared off the back of the Fadden by-election that Opposition leader Peter Dutton will win the next 15 Federal elections and go on to be Australia’s most glorious leader. ”Albo... Read More ›
The Opposition’s resident numerology expert, Sussan Ley, has spent the weekend considering whether to challenge unpopular Opposition leader Peter Dutton following last week’s horrific Robodebt findings. “Susssan has been ringing around checking with her numerologist, astrologist and even her kinesiologist... Read More ›
Opposition leader Peter Dutton, a man who proudly walked out on the apology to the stolen generation, has called for a sensible debate on the merits of bringing back the white Australia policy. ”Look, I’m not racist but, we need... Read More ›