Congratulations, you’ve made it to the end of the year. Here are a few tips to help you move out of your dorms:
Log on to your housing portal and click the button marked “Express Checkout.” This will immediately cut the power to your room and disable your key.
Be sure that previous step is the last thing you do. We probably should have mentioned that.
Have your parents try and find the designated parking lots since our student volunteers made the signs out of the brown bathroom paper towels, and they all blew away.
After driving a few laps around the entire campus, find the only remaining spot next to a large grass field you’ll have to carry all your stuff across.
There are three rolling bins to be shared between the thousands of students leaving today. If you’re lucky enough to find one, your stuff will constantly fall out of the large holes in them. They also will absolutely not roll over grass.
Even though it is ninety-two degrees, please wear jeans and long-sleeve shirts since our grassy field is riddled with ticks.