An urgent inquiry has been called in to security at Canberra’s Parliament house after King Charles’ visit was marred by former PM, Tony Abbott, getting within knighting distance of his majesty. ”We nearly had a disaster on our hands what... Read More ›
Tony Abbott
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has demanded a revamp of the Australian Maths syllabus to ensure that more emphasis is put on division. ”It is totally unacceptable that the average Australian kid leaves school knowing how to add and multiply but... Read More ›
Australia’s de facto Prime Minister, according to the ABC and News Corp, Peter Dutton, has today issued an edict that when he becomes official PM he will anoint low-rating Sky News Australia host, Peta Credlin, Governor General of Australia. ”Peta... Read More ›
Former Australian Prime Minister (yep, really), Tony Abbott, has told the UK Conservatives who have just been walloped in the British election, that they lost due to being not far enough to the right. ”Rishi had some good ideas, national... Read More ›
Australia’s 26 million people have spent the morning trying to get the image of Rupert Murdoch’s wedding night out of their head. “I’m trying to think of nice things like a beautiful lake with ducks floating on it but it’s... Read More ›
Former Prime Minister (yep, really) Tony Abbott, has demanded that current Prime Minister, Anthony Albanese, send the army over to the UK to help track down Princess Kate. ”A strong monarchy makes a strong Australia,” said Mr Rabbit. ”Albo needs... Read More ›
Tony Abbott, star of the hit ABC show Nemesis, has called upon the Prime Minister, Anthony Albanese, to immediately knight King Charles or face being shirt fronted. ”King Charles loves this country and Australians, well at least 6 of us,... Read More ›
The Opposition’s shadow minister for home and foreign affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has demanded the Government issue a National apology to victims of the previous Government’s bonk ban. ”A lot of lives were ruined due to the ill-thought through bonk ban,”... Read More ›
Low rating Sky News host, Peta Credlin, has sent former Victorian Premier Dan Andrews a thank you note after his resignation led her to achieve the greatest orgasm of her life. ”I’m not actually a smoker but after that I... Read More ›
Former Australian Prime Minister (yep, really) Tony Abbott has called upon Prime Minister Anthony Albanese to do the right thing, in light of Australia retaining the Ashes via a draw, and knight the English cricket team. ”I know a win... Read More ›