Sussan Ley

Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has issued a directive to all his underlings to stop talking about criminalising abortion until after they win the next election. ”Though banning abortion is very popular in America and to some elements of the base,... Read More ›

The Opposition’s spokesperson for numerology and using tax payers cash in order to purchase investment properties, Sussan Ley, has denied that it is weird that she added an extra S to her first name. ”Numerology has added so much more... Read More ›

Opposition leader and part-time Voldemort cosplayer, Peter Dutton, has sauntered off to the United States in an effort to help make Australia great again. ”Peter will be away for a few weeks, he will be meeting some important people and... Read More ›

Following dismal results in the latest News Poll polling the Opposition’s leading advocate of numerology, Sussan Ley, has called upon colleagues to rebrand their toxic energy plan and call it nnuclear ppower. ”Numerology has done wonders for me, so I... Read More ›

Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, fresh off releasing no new details of his nuclear power policy, has reacted angrily to all those against the policy (sic) saying: ”let them eat yellow cake.” ”Bloody Greenies, inner city elite and the so-called journalists... Read More ›

The Opposition leader (for now), Peter Dutton, has refused to rule out National service in Australia for those aged 40 and under. The move follows UK PM (as of publishing), Rishi Sunak, promising to introduce National service in the UK... Read More ›

The Opposition’s leading proponent of numerology, Sussan Ley, is speculated to this week be considering mounting a challenge to leader Peter Dutton, following the weekends dire polling results for the Coalition. ”We thought with the media going to town and... Read More ›

Australian Opposition leader, Peter ”Disappearing” Dutton, has sent out an angry missive to journalists reminding them that he does not work weekends. ”Yeah the bloody journo’s need to learn that Pete doesn’t do weekends, or questions,” said a Liberal Party... Read More ›

Opposition leader (for now), lil’ Petey Dutton, has chucked an epic tantrum, taking his bat and ball and going home to his room, following his humiliating loss at the weekend’s Dunkley by-election. ”Yeah, Petey is taking this one really hard,”... Read More ›

Advance Australia, an ultra right-wing lobby group run by a collective of billionaires, has made the startling claim that Prime Minister, Anthony Albanese, was the actual killer of former US President JFK. ”We have conclusive proof that Albo shot JFK,”... Read More ›