Barnaby Joyce

Peter Dutton’s minister for home affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has demanded that the Government put together a plan to bail out American ‘restaurant’ Hooters and potentially nationalise it, as the chain enters administration. ”What sort of a World are we living... Read More ›

Australian Opposition leader, Gina Rinehart, has been heard telling colleagues that she views Coalition Senator, Jacinta Nampijinpa Price, the best Senator that money can buy. ”Gina is a big fan of Jacinta and was so happy when her lap dog,... Read More ›

Peter Dutton’s plan to alleviate the cost of living crisis by allowing businesses to ‘write-off’ long lunches has caused chaos amongst the Coalition, after the decision was made to exclude booze from being written off. ”Bloody Dutton needs to get... Read More ›

Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has launched his party’s plans for the upcoming election at a small gathering on the fringes of Melbourne. The key plank to Donald Dutton’s campaign is his pledge to make Gina, err, Australia great again. ”Australian’s,... Read More ›

The Opposition’s shadow minister for home and foreign affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has pledged to make it illegal in Australia to sell gingerbread people without baked on genitals, in an effort to combat wokeness. ”I’ve had a bloody gutful, what is... Read More ›

The Opposition’s head cheer leader at The Australian, lil’ Simon Benson, has thanked his favourite person in the World, Daddy Dutton, for giving him the scoop on the Coalition’s alleged nuclear plan. ”I love you Daddy Dutton, you’re so much... Read More ›

Peter Dutton’s shadow minister for home and foreign affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has pledged his allegiance to his leader by swearing that from now on he will only wear Australian flag patterned silk boxers. ”I am a man that usually doesn’t... Read More ›

Peter Dutton’s shadow minister for home and foreign affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has pledged to only drink himself into a stupor at pubs that honour Australia Day. The decision came after his leader, Donald Dutton, started his latest culture war attacking... Read More ›

The Opposition’s shadow minister for home and foreign affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has told his colleagues that he is ready to fight the next election and promises his leader, Peter Dutton, that he will handle the Nation’s swinging voters. ”When you... Read More ›

The Opposition’s shadow minister for home and foreign affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has called on the Government to look into the issue of shrinkflation. Namely the shrinkflation he gets whilst swimming. ”Albo’s keen to get out their and tackle shrinkflation, fair... Read More ›