Andrew Hastie

The Coalition’s leader in exile, lil’ Andy Hastie, is undecided on when he will stick the knife in to interim Coalition leader, Sussan ‘SS’ Ley, he is leaning towards doing so next year, as it will allow him to have... Read More ›

The Opposition’s newest talisman, Barnaby Joyce, has spent the weekend asking his colleagues to jump. This directive has been met with a smile from interim Opposition leader, Sussan ‘SS’ Ley, and a query of how high? ”It’s a sign of... Read More ›

As Parliament winds down for the year the faceless (but not voiceless) men of the Liberal party are tipped to tap interim leader, Sussan Ley, on the shoulder to call for a leadership spill and ask her to please bring... Read More ›

Interim Opposition leader, Sussan ‘SS’ Ley, is tipped today to announce a new Coalition slogan, what Barnaby wants Barnaby gets, as well as a ban on monogamy. ”We’ve had a really constructive week, the team and I,” said SS Ley.... Read More ›

The moderate wing of the Coalition (apparently they exist), have told anyone who’ll listen, that they may bend over and accept the party dropping net-zero but they won’t be happy. ”It’s time that our colleagues start listening to what we... Read More ›

Former Prime Minister, Tony Abbott, has taken some time out from rewriting Australian history to offer some advice to beleaguered opposition leader, Sussan Ley. His advice, to consider knighting Prince Andrew. ”Everyone loves a Royal, so why not bestow upon... Read More ›

Interim Opposition leader, Sussan Ley, has reached out to her rebellious colleague, Barnaby Joyce, to invite him over for a lovely beef wellington dinner. ”Teams squabble from time to time but what good teams do is they always settle their... Read More ›

Interim Opposition leader, Sussan Ley, has told colleagues that she plans to arrest her falling popularity by adding an extra S to her name. ”People were very interested to hear why I am Sussan, not Susan,” said the interim leader.... Read More ›

Sussan Ley’s shadow minister for home affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has responded to unrest in the Coalition by urging colleagues to consider an open marriage, or perhaps swinging. ”Monogamy is a thing of the past, we need to get out and... Read More ›

Leader of the National party (for now), David Littleproud, has told his Coalition partners, the Liberals, to forget about winning over the inner city elites and focus on winning over the 2,000 odd voters who live around the back O’... Read More ›