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Opposition leader (for now) Peter Dutton has condemned Victorian Premier Dan Andrews over traffic in Melbourne, after his candidate for the upcoming Aston bi-election spent 40 minutes driving from their home in Fitzroy to the electorate. ”What planet does comrade... Read More ›

Perennial election loser, Mark Latham, has blamed the low vote tally of his current party One Nation from the weekend’s NSW state election on the state’s low level of literacy. ”Bloody electoral commission! How dare they expect our voters to... Read More ›

NSW Premier (for now) Dominic Perrotet has told voters to make sure they bring cash when voting in tomorrow’s election as there will be toll booths operating at all voting booths in Western Sydney. ”We didn’t have enough time to... Read More ›

The Australian Electoral Commission has confirmed that busy voters wishing to draw a picture of a cock and balls on their ballot paper will be given an option of ticking a box next to a pre drawn cock and balls.... Read More ›

The Australian Greens have today called for the immediate banning of the traditional Election Day sausage sizzle, declaring that it is highly insensitive to vegetarians and that the phallic nature of the sausage is intimidating to female voters. “For too... Read More ›

With the NSW election on Saturday worried NSW Liberal party members have filed a missing persons report after federal opposition leader Peter Dutton has not been seen in the State since the election was called. ”Albo’s been everywhere with Minns,... Read More ›

The Victorian capital of Melbourne has this week been named the World’s most livable city for Nazi’s. The news came as footage went around the World of a group of Nazi’s being chaperoned in front or Parliament house by the... Read More ›

The Albanese Government has come up with the novel solution of solving Australia’s gas shortage by selling the mining rights to niche news network Sky News After Dark ”The gas reserves coming out of Paul Murray’s show alone is enough... Read More ›

The SMH’s pompous blowhard at large Peter Fitzsimons has rushed to the Herald’s office to soothe and calm the paper’s journalists following their encounter with former Prime Minister Paul Keating. ”Was good of Pete to come in as Bevan really... Read More ›

Former PM Scott Morrison’s wife Jen has promised the part-time member for Cook to take him to Subway for a sandwich and a cookie, in an effort to cheer him up after he watched current PM, Anthony Albanese in America... Read More ›