Peter Dutton

Opposition leader (for now) Peter Dutton has had his episode of the ABC show Kitchen Cabinet delayed until a toxicologists report can come back and report on what sort of mushroom Peter used in his casserole. ”It was all going... Read More ›

The federal Opposition has condemned the Government over their decision to implement 60 day prescriptions, a move which will drop the price of medication, helping pensioners, but affecting chemists. ”Where does Anthony Albanese get off,” fumed Opposition leader Peter Dutton.... Read More ›

Opposition leader (for now) Peter Dutton has defended the fact that he has never attended the Garma festival, telling colleagues that he has arrested plenty of indigenous people in his time. ”A lot is being made that Pete has never... Read More ›

Opposition leader (for now) Peter Dutton has told reporters that he already has plans this weekend to wash his hair, so will be unable to make it to the Garma festival, after being invited by the Prime Minister Anthony Albanese.... Read More ›

Under fire former Prime Minister, Scott Morrison, has called current Opposition leader Peter Dutton to tell him of his plan of how they can win back Government with the signature policy, Robodebt 2 electric boogaloo. ”Scotty is very excited about... Read More ›

Former Australian Prime Minister (yep, really) Scotty from marketing, has taken to the socials to launch his new catch phrase: ”Don’t blame me, I didn’t do it.” ”People have a lot of expectations on a former Prime Minister,” said Scotty... Read More ›

Opposition leader (for now) Peter Dutton has followed his predecessors lead and buggered off overseas to avoid questioning over dodgy contract processes he was involved in as head of home affairs whilst in Government. ”Peter Dutton does take stock in... Read More ›

Beleaguered Opposition leader Peter Dutton has defended his time in office as head of home affairs, including his controversial decision to hire death eaters to guard Manus Island. ”My record as head of home affairs was beyond reproach,” cried the... Read More ›

Former Australian Prime Minister (yep, really) Tony Abbott has called upon Prime Minister Anthony Albanese to do the right thing, in light of Australia retaining the Ashes via a draw, and knight the English cricket team. ”I know a win... Read More ›

Low rating news and opinion channel Sky News Australia have declared off the back of the Fadden by-election that Opposition leader Peter Dutton will win the next 15 Federal elections and go on to be Australia’s most glorious leader. ”Albo... Read More ›