Sussan Ley

Opposition leader (LOL) Peter Dutton has said: ”Who?” When asked today about the whereabouts of his shadow Indigenous Affairs minister Jacinta Nampijimpa Price. ”I’m not sure who this Jacinta person is that you are asking about,” said the Opposition leader.... Read More ›

The LNP, fresh off wrecking the Voice referendum has proposed a new referendum on whether to recognise trust fund baby Gina Rinehart as current custodian of the Nation. ”Gina gives us so much and asks for so little in return,”... Read More ›

Low rating cable channel, Sky News Australia, has pledged that it’s hosts will walk backwards around Australia this month to encourage the Nation to vote no at the upcoming referendum. ”Australians will be inspired to see some of the countries... Read More ›

Opposition leader (for now) Peter Dutton has had his episode of the ABC show Kitchen Cabinet delayed until a toxicologists report can come back and report on what sort of mushroom Peter used in his casserole. ”It was all going... Read More ›

The federal Opposition has condemned the Government over their decision to implement 60 day prescriptions, a move which will drop the price of medication, helping pensioners, but affecting chemists. ”Where does Anthony Albanese get off,” fumed Opposition leader Peter Dutton.... Read More ›

Opposition leader (for now) Peter Dutton has followed his predecessors lead and buggered off overseas to avoid questioning over dodgy contract processes he was involved in as head of home affairs whilst in Government. ”Peter Dutton does take stock in... Read More ›

Low rating news and opinion channel Sky News Australia have declared off the back of the Fadden by-election that Opposition leader Peter Dutton will win the next 15 Federal elections and go on to be Australia’s most glorious leader. ”Albo... Read More ›

The Liberal party has put word out that should their leader Peter Dutton lose the upcoming Fadden by-election, then they will replace him with a pot plant. ”Dutts knows that he needs to pull something out of the bag,” said... Read More ›

The Opposition’s resident numerology expert, Sussan Ley, has spent the weekend considering whether to challenge unpopular Opposition leader Peter Dutton following last week’s horrific Robodebt findings. “Susssan has been ringing around checking with her numerologist, astrologist and even her kinesiologist... Read More ›

The Dark Lord Peter Dutton’s Coalition has today launched their plan to keep the Australian budget in the black, by suing their way to prosperity. ”Australians don’t need to be afraid of any Government that I lead,” said the Dark... Read More ›