Barnaby Joyce

Following dismal results in the latest News Poll polling the Opposition’s leading advocate of numerology, Sussan Ley, has called upon colleagues to rebrand their toxic energy plan and call it nnuclear ppower. ”Numerology has done wonders for me, so I... Read More ›

Peter Dutton’s shadow minister for home and foreign affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has apologised after accidentally sending the hawk tuah video to all his contacts, for the second time this week. ”What can I say, I’m a bit clumsy when it... Read More ›

The Opposition’s shadow minister for home and foreign affairs, Barnaby Joyce, was seen storming around parliament house ranting and raving after learning that the Government planned to ban Tutti Fruitti flavoured vapes, his personal favourite. ”Bloody Government, they need to... Read More ›

The Opposition’s shadow minister for home and foreign affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has launched a nation wide campaign to encourage all Australians to pull out. ”Trust me, I know the consequences of not pulling out,” said the member for New England.... Read More ›

The Opposition leader (for now), Peter Dutton, has refused to rule out National service in Australia for those aged 40 and under. The move follows UK PM (as of publishing), Rishi Sunak, promising to introduce National service in the UK... Read More ›

The Coalition’s junior member, the National party, have come out today demanding that the Albanese Government bring back leaded petrol. ”What sort of weak minded individual is Albo that he has a problem with lead?” Asked the National’s chief agitator... Read More ›

Australia’s Vegans have launched a petition to ban the Bunnings sausage sizzle, claiming the smell of burning flesh combined with the phallic shape of the sausage is off putting and offensive to the community at large. ”It’s time that Bunnings... Read More ›

Opposition leader and self-described friend of the worker, Peter Dutton, has declared that any Government that he leads will allow the Nation’s Tradies to be able to bully Uni students out of their lunch money. ”What sort of World do... Read More ›

The Opposition’s shadow minister for home and foreign affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has put out a statement to reassure the Nation’s female folk that he is a lover not a fighter. ”It is a tough time for women right now,” said... Read More ›

Opposition leader and enthusiastic Voldemort cos-player, Peter Dutton, has sent his apologies to the organisers of last weekends women’s marches, telling them that he was busy washing his hair. ”I know it may appear that I do not have any... Read More ›