“Prosecutors have found racketeering laws to be powerful tools in targeting not only foot soldiers in a criminal enterprise, but also high-level decision makers.” — The New York Times
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Yeah, that’s right, it’s me, Racketeering Charges, and I’m bursting into this ex-president judicial drama like the Kool-Aid Man of inscrutable justice. How bad am I? Very bad. What do I mean exactly? Unclear. But will I get the job done? You better believe it.
Sure, the old president has already been indicted a whole bunch of times. We’ve got some obstruction of justice charges, some false statement charges—but that’s kiddie stuff. Nothing gets the job done quite like me.
What even is racketeering, you ask? Honey, what is air? What is time? I cannot be defined in simple human language, and this only strengthens my powers.