Chicka Chicka Boom Boom
Some people are wising up and removing this bawdy board book from impressionable kindergarten classrooms. The title alone is filthy. It encourages kids to join orgies, which is obviously how all those letters got injured up there in the so-called “coconut tree.”
The Very Hungry Caterpillar
Normalizes binge eating and obesity. All this does is teach little kids—even girls!—that it’s okay to consume food when you’re hungry. To make matters worse, the caterpillar doesn’t go on a diet, doesn’t hate itself, and doesn’t even get properly shunned by society for its gross and destructive dietary choices. Instead, it turns into a literal butterfly. Not only is this the opposite message we should be sending children, but it’s completely unrealistic.
The Giving Tree
A story of handouts. Flat-out socialism. Not to mention the climate-thumper extremism of giving the tree feelings. “Oh no, a tree is sad. It turns into a pathetic little stump. Whatever will we do?” Ridiculous.