auspol

Shadow treasurer, Ted O’Brien, has told reporters that going forward he would like to be referred to by his new nickname, TeOb. He has also asked reporters to start describing him as a bit of a daggy Dad. ”Now that... Read More ›

Shadow Treasurer (for now), Ted O’Brien, has arrived to work late today due to managing to get his tie caught in his briefcase, this is the third time this month that this has happened. ”They’re tricky things ties aren’t they?”... Read More ›

Sky News Australia host, Sharri Markson, has blamed antisemitism for her show’s appallingly low ratings record. ”The Australian people are clearly antisemitic, I mean why else would they not be watching my show?” Asked the host. ”Every night I deliver... Read More ›

Israeli Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu, was shocked to learn that his appearance on Sharri Markson’s Sky News show was only watched by 10’s of people. The Israeli PM is blaming the low ratings on Australian Prime Minister Anthony Albanese. ”It’s... Read More ›

Interim Opposition leader and practicing numerologist, Sussan Ley, has held a press conference to condemn the PM’s decision to say good morning, claiming the statement was offensive to both the afternoon and evening. ”Mr Albanese needs to stop seeking to... Read More ›

Australia is set to meet their target of hitting net zero much earlier than 2050 after scientists managed to figure out how to channel the anger generated from low-rating cable channel, Sky News Australia, to power the grid. ”It’s early... Read More ›

Australian election result denialists, Sky News, have spent the day ranting and raving over how the Coalition needs to move further to the right, following the release of the first post-election news poll which has the Coalition doing worse than... Read More ›

The party of attention seeking racists, otherwise known as One Nation, have unsurprisingly chosen the opening of parliament to do something racist, by turning their backs on the acknowledgement of country. ”After the election Labor doesn’t really need us to... Read More ›

The Opposition’s shadow minister for home affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has told colleagues that he will defy the Coalition and seek to introduce a private member’s bill that will repeal the net zero bonk ban. ”Australians have had a gutful of... Read More ›

Australians have woken up this morning to the shocking news that former Labor/Liberal Democrat/One Nation turned Independent politician, Mark Latham, has managed to pull a root. News of Mr Latham’s root was revealed in court documents. ”A lot of Australians... Read More ›