Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has issued a directive to all his underlings to stop talking about criminalising abortion until after they win the next election. ”Though banning abortion is very popular in America and to some elements of the base,... Read More ›
Sky News
The Queensland Liberal/National Party (LNP) have today announced plans to desex the cast of popular TV show Bluey, should they win the upcoming election. ”I’m sure the people of Queensland will agree that it is time to take back the... Read More ›
Coat hanger producers are talking up the prospect of a sales boom in the Australian state of Queensland, should the LNP party form Government following the upcoming election. ”It really is the golden age of coathangers,” said coat hanger manufacturer... Read More ›
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has demanded a revamp of the Australian Maths syllabus to ensure that more emphasis is put on division. ”It is totally unacceptable that the average Australian kid leaves school knowing how to add and multiply but... Read More ›
Australia’s de facto Prime Minister, according to the ABC and News Corp, Peter Dutton, has today issued an edict that when he becomes official PM he will anoint low-rating Sky News Australia host, Peta Credlin, Governor General of Australia. ”Peta... Read More ›
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, fresh off verbally abusing an ABC reporter after they dared ask him a question, has demanded that all ABC staff hand over their lunch money to their peers (sic) at Sky News Australia. ”These ABC journalists... Read More ›
Fresh off the news of the alleged assassination attempt against felon turned Presidential nominee, Donald Trump, Sky News Australia is reporting of an assassination attempt against Coalition leader, Peter Dutton, after a man was seen nearby carrying a potato peeler.... Read More ›
The Opposition’s shadow minister for home and foreign affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has demanded that all airlines, but especially Qantas, bring back the mile high club. ”Flying around the country is part of the job, so why am I prevented from... Read More ›
This afternoon King Charles, a dude who once told his sidepiece that he’d like to identify as a Tampon, will visit Australia. The trip will be paid for by the Australian taxpayer in what is said to be a boon... Read More ›
The NSW Liberal party, fresh off discovering one of their politicians has been charged with rape, has been placed into administration by the Federal Lib’s, with leader Peter Dutton telling his NSW counterparts to not worry, as Daddy’s here. ”It... Read More ›