Former Prime Minister (yep, really), Scott Morrison, has been spotted setting up a card table outside his favourite date night venue, Engadine Maccas, in an effort to sell more copies of his recently released book. ”They say the early bird... Read More ›
Opposition Leader
Divisive Peter Dutton has called for the nation to come together and settle the argument once and for all by demanding that all Australian’s call them potato scallops. ”It’s time for someone to take charge and start dealing with the... Read More ›
On the penultimate day of polling before Saturday’s election, a Liberal candidate, whom we cannot name or show due to the risk of being censored by the Tasmanian electoral commission, has answered Peter who? When asked where the Federal Opposition... Read More ›
Australian Opposition leader (yep,really), Peter Dutton, is tipped to announce this week that fictional character Homer Simpson will be his new nuclear advisor in the run up to the next election. ”Homer Simpson brings a lot to the table,” said... Read More ›
Opposition leader (for now), Peter Dutton, has written to the Prime Minister to ask that the next sitting of parliament be delayed, as Gina Rinehart needs her cat fed. ”The Prime Minister should do the right thing and delay parliament... Read More ›
Opposition leader (for now), Peter Dutton, has fumed after his appearance on the ABC’s 7:30 report led to him being asked actual questions by host Sarah Ferguson. ”This is so typical of the inner city, lefty, woke ABC elites,” fumed... Read More ›
Opposition leader (LOL) Peter Dutton has said: ”Who?” When asked today about the whereabouts of his shadow Indigenous Affairs minister Jacinta Nampijimpa Price. ”I’m not sure who this Jacinta person is that you are asking about,” said the Opposition leader.... Read More ›
Perennial failure, the Dark Lord Peter Dutton, has headed off to India this week on official Government business, despite not being in Government. Mr Dutton is planning on telling everyone he meets in India to not bother to come to... Read More ›
Low rating news channel, Sky News Australia, has rushed out a press release that takes credit for Victorian Premier Dan Andrews retirement. ”What a great day, not only for Victoria, but also for our viewers, all 6 of them,” said... Read More ›
Opposition leader (for now) Peter Dutton has told reporters that he already has plans this weekend to wash his hair, so will be unable to make it to the Garma festival, after being invited by the Prime Minister Anthony Albanese.... Read More ›