He listens when you speak, he appears to understand his privilege and complex power dynamics, and he’s never once lectured you about a Paul Thomas Anderson movie—sorry, “film.” Though not necessarily a common occurrence, coming across a seemingly perfect cis heterosexual man, either socially or in the workplace, can be a very overwhelming experience.
Maybe he’s the only man in the office who doesn’t talk about sports at the start of every meeting—completely oblivious to who might be left out of the conversation. Or maybe you met him on a dating app, and he actually asked you a question about yourself. At first, you might have thought, “Wow, he sees me as a fully realized human being with agency and he has a nice haircut. This is too good to be true.” It’s probably not too good to be true. It’s just too good to be entirely his doing.
