They don’t tell you this in the Hot Dog Handbook, but hot dogs are hungry for mystery…
There’s something weird leaking from gas station ceilings. What’s dribbling down is not rainwater or condensation from an AC unit or anything gnarly like that—it’s a pink juice we like to call “Mystery D.” Some people suspect the juice is windshield-washer fluid or Mountain Dew Spark. But we know it’s not any of that stuff—it’s Mystery D.
Look for the big hole in the ceiling once you’re inside a gas station. It should be right above the commercial hot dog steamer and the liquid cheese dispenser. And teetering on stilts—in the space between—you will find a stinky old milk crate lined with a garbage bag. The function of this receptacle is to collect Mystery D from the source, presumably so it can be bottled and sold as antifreeze or Pepto Bismol. But who gives a shit about that? We’re here because we want to take the ultimate ride.
You want the ultimate? Drop Mystery D on your hot dog.