As your Santa, it is my right to run the North Pole exactly how I want to, and I have to say, it’s about time we made some changes to this dump. And believe me, there is no bigger problem than a lack of space to throw holiday ragers. Therefore, I am exercising my full authority to demolish this antiquated and boring workshop and build a beautiful ballroom.
To all of you losers getting your stockings in a twist, how could you not see this coming? I literally told you all I was going to remake the role of Santa. And time and time again, I have delivered on what I campaigned on. Promises kept, for those who celebrate.



