“Through calculated chaos and spectacle, Trump distracts the media and public from the dangerous consequences of his agenda.” — Andrew Mitrovica, Al Jazeera
Well, he finally did it. Controversial business magnate Lex Luthor has surrounded Earth with LexCorp satellites, targeting their lethal laser beams at every head of state in the world. Unless Superman reveals his secret identity by midnight, Luthor will assassinate presidents and prime ministers, one by one. The world watches the clock in fear, questioning whether Superman will save us, terrified of who will be first.
In the face of this threat to worldwide order, I am here to tell you this: Do not worry about it.
It is just a distraction. It is fine.
Consider the timing. Isn’t it all a little convenient that he just happened to hatch a dastardly plot one week after a nefarious scheme?


