Well, another presidential election is here. Again. It feels like only yesterday that we were waiting in line for hours to cast our ballots, slowly rocking in front of the TV while the Big Map turned bruised colors and stress-eating leftover Halloween chocolate like a dog intent on seeing God.
Don’t worry. Our Founding Fathers had a dream for our great nation. And if we could teleport them to this very moment, they’d look around and say, “Yep, this is exactly what we were going for.”
If John Hancock saw you frantically refreshing the New York Times Election Needle like a lab rat pulling a lever, he’d weep. With joy.
That’s democracy in action, baby.
Election Day is supposed to be the culmination of a beautiful, natural process that starts with George Washington sticking his head through your window and asking, “Can I count on YOU for four shillings?” every day for a year, in increasingly manic tones.
In his wildest fantasies, John Adams hoped that, someday, we would get free stickers and greet each other like our grandmothers are all having open-heart surgery.