Everyone knows it’s hard being the high school basketball team that lost to Air Bud. He’s a dog; it’s an embarrassing defeat. But people don’t realize it’s worse being the team that went out, played hard, and beat that beloved golden retriever by eighty-seven points.
Famously, there’s no rule against a dog playing basketball. Apparently, there is one big rule about forfeiting against a dog playing basketball. I gladly would’ve given Air Bud’s team of ragtag teens the morally uplifting win, but the Washington State Athletic Commission made us spend forty-five minutes dunking on man’s best friend.
Trust me, we tried to lose, but it wasn’t enough. Air Bud is very skilled at bouncing a game-winning shot off his snout in an emotional third-act climax, but he’s less adept at small things like dribbling. The dog does not have hands. I said that phrase so many times during the game. There’s only so much stalling you can do before your team starts draining mid-range jumpers.
