The Amelia Uncertainty Principle. As confidence in your toddler’s current shoe size increases, consistency in sizing across shoe manufacturers decreases.
Alder’s Observation. A toddler in motion remains in motion. A toddler at rest will pee on itself.
The Third Law of Theo Dynamics. If an object exceeds the temperature of 100 degrees Fahrenheit, the atoms of a toddler will begin moving toward that object.
The Jordynn Theorem. The emotional strain of installing a car seat in an airport rental lot produces enough heat and light to be visible from other galaxies.
Graham’s Principle of Least Restraint. The kinetic energy of a thrown Hot Wheels car must always exceed the shatter resistance of a newly replaced bedroom window.
Hanako’s Axiom. It is true that all right angles are equal to one another, and that your toddler will run full-tilt into every right angle in your home an equal number of times.