Our 5th most-read article of 2023.
Originally published May 12, 2023.
Voicemail: “Hi, sweetie. No big news over here—and no rush to call me back.”
Urgency: I am bursting to tell you HUGE NEWS. (The township finally paved over that pothole.)
Voicemail: “Hi, sweetie, just calling to say hi. Nothing’s wrong.”
Urgency: Something definitely is gravely wrong.
Voicemail: “Hey, sweetie. Give me a call back whenever, okay?”
Urgency: I objectively understand that this is unimportant, but I’ve been stuck on twenty-two across for an hour, and I feel like you’ll know it because it regards what I consider a “young person interest,” and I still mistakenly think of you as young.