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Last month, my beloved dog Buster suddenly became unresponsive. He could barely move, and he refused to eat or drink. After an ultrasound, the vet told us she found an incurable cancerous mass on his spleen. “Take him home and give him all of his favorite treats,” she said, “and then call me tomorrow and we’ll say good-bye.” On the way home, in a pit of abject devastation, I stopped by the Cambridge PetSmart down near Alewife and picked up a spread of special dog treats.

Enter the Dunkin’ Vanilla Glaze Flavor Dog Biscuits, an absurd donut-shaped treat that nobody asked for. Made with vague ingredients and enriched with flavors dogs crave, such as “yogurt” and “natural flavors,” these iced dog biscuits are sprinkled with rainbow jimmies that add a burst of color to the tartar controlling crunch.

This agreement is between me (“me”) and you (“the dog”) and is designed to govern the rules, policies, and expected behavior on our walks together.

Definitions and
walk cancellation policies

You are entitled to one (1) long walk per day, not including our four (4) regularly scheduled trips around the block so that you can conduct your business. If an urgent need arises outside of these planned trips, a signal such as pawing at the door or barking is requested before rendering diarrhea.

Each long walk will be for a period between one and three hours, and is contingent on factors like weather conditions, my current work schedule, and how much battery life remains in my earbuds.

If a long walk is not possible due to force majeure such as illness or inclement weather, you are entitled to equivalent compensation, including an indoor training session to perfect your sitting, an extra bone, and some tennis ball tosses (not to exceed one hundred tosses in a period of twelve hours. This is non-negotiable. No, really. Don’t stand next to the ball and tilt your head like that.)

Exclusive: Labour's Mayor of the North East Kim McGuinness says Government's progress on devolving power has been "slow" because "our leaders haven’t trusted local people"

The Stanford Daily argues the First Amendment protects journalists from arcane laws used against Mahmoud Khalil and Rümeysa Öztürk.

The post The Student Newspaper Suing Marco Rubio Over Targeted Deportations appeared first on The Intercept.

Spending some lovely summer days at our summer residence in the Karlskrona​ archipelago with our youngest daughter and dog. A balm for the soul. .

With the above cautions in mind, we may view each statistical analysis as a thought experiment in a fictional “small world” or “toy example” sharply restricted by its simplifying assumptions. The questions that motivated the study must be translated properly into this fictional world; statistical methods then answer the questions via mathematical deductions from the […]

In the week before the opening of Ro Robertson and Jill McKnight’s exhibitions at the Northern Gallery for Contemporary Art (NGCA), an enormous cargo ship named Van Jaguar arrived at Sunderland Port. Docked across the Wear, in view of the National Glass Centre (NGC), the ship dwarfed the gallery and was an almost-too-perfect coincidence at […]

The Cambridge professor providing the intellectual underpinning for JD Vance and Nigel Farage, is described by one academic colleague as being 'more Tommy Robinson than St Thomas Aquinas'

Last Sunday's protests for Palestine mobilised the largest nationwide crowds to date—and broadened the movement’s reach into the unions and sections of the Labor Party.

The post Largest nationwide protests for Palestine so far demand sanctions now first appeared on Solidarity Online.

The US government is to take a 15% cut of Nvidia and AMD chip sale profits to China. There are also discussion of taking a 10% stock share in Intel. Meanwhile the Pentagon has taken a hundred million dollar stake in a rare earth miner, and guaranteed minimum prices. As Albert Pinto notes, this isn’t […]

The Opposition’s shadow minister for home affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has told colleagues that he will defy the Coalition and seek to introduce a private member’s bill that will repeal the net zero bonk ban. ”Australians have had a gutful of... Read More ›

In 1958, with the publication of the twenty-fifth volume of Econometrica, Trygve Haavelmo assessed the role of econometrics in advancing economics. While he praised its ‘repair work’ and ‘clearing-up work,’ he also found reason for despair: We have found certain general principles which would seem to make good sense. Essentially, these principles are based on […]

Infamous marriage-inequality enthusiast and former Kentucky county clerk Kim Davis made headlines again this month...

Trump aims to expel Abrego Garcia as his global gulag expands to Uganda, which has a long record of human rights abuses.

The post Trump Administration Wants to Banish Kilmar Abrego Garcia to Uganda appeared first on The Intercept.

Like a fool, I used to resist, but no more. In the past, I railed against the rise of AI. I preached small-minded sermons to students who had to sit through my tirades to get a passing grade. I used to curse and mutter at the head of the class, as the commercial for Grammarly played when I tried to show a YouTube clip about permaculture. Now, I search for the Grammarly commercials, show them in their entirety, then try to convert any students who, somehow, remain unconvinced of AI’s absolute utility.

I call such pitiable souls The Lost. Some of them are still writing their own essays, if you can believe that. Some of them even aspire—and I promise you that I’m not making this up—to write an entire book at some point in their life. Thankfully, there is still hope for The Lost, and it comes, now as ever, in the form of embracing salvation, which looks like this:

DHS’s social media is at it again, and while I’m looking forward to more deep...

A Trump-connected regulator with a home-building empire is on a rampage at the Federal Reserve to lower interest rates, which may benefit his business.

The U.S. is interested in acquiring machine-learning technology to carry out AI-generated propaganda campaigns overseas.

The post Pentagon Document: U.S. Wants to “Suppress Dissenting Arguments” Using AI Propaganda appeared first on The Intercept.

More than even a poet, Nietzsche was a prophet—a jaundiced, nihilistic, and cracked prophet, but a prophet nonetheless.

My friend was bitten by a dog this summer. For British readers: being bitten by a dog elsewhere in the world isn’t merely painful, scary and shocking. It brings with it a real possibility of rabies. For non-British reader – really, I’m not making this up, there’s no rabies in the UK. My friend is […]

By age three, your authoritarian should be able to blame juice spills on political enemies, such as a baby sibling or a weird uncle. If he or she (but likely he) can’t, you should begin offering assistance. Tip over his cup of juice and see if he diverts the blame.

By age four, your authoritarian should be starting to demand loyalty from others, such as their stuffed animals.

Your authoritarian should start to create alternative facts by age five. If they haven’t, they might be dumb. Don’t worry, though—a lack of intellect doesn’t preclude them from becoming an authoritarian.

By age six, your authoritarian should have convinced a younger sibling that vegetables are a leftist conspiracy. The conspiracy itself should be easy for them to grasp, as it is true. What you want to look out for is their persuasion skills—are they developing at a normal pace? And if your authoritarian doesn’t have a younger sibling, make one. You don’t want them falling behind.