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Created
Wed, 16/07/2025 - 17:00
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July 16th, 2025next

July 16th, 2025: I don't know what flabbers look like, but I suspect them to be slightly rude.

– Ryan

Created
Wed, 16/07/2025 - 13:45

It’s a basic shibboleth of the modern Left that Big Tech is deeply dystopian. In their desperation to hoover up every last drop of our data, a handful of firms have constructed a full-blown surveillance apparatus that they continue to spend billions finessing. They have built casinoified apps that have obliterated our attention spans and […]

Created
Wed, 16/07/2025 - 03:00

Welcome, soft idiot. You’ve been issued a Human Body, the most fragile, overpromised, poorly updated model in the known universe. It arrives preloaded with ten to fourteen irrational fears, a vague longing for something you can’t name, and knees made of soup.

Please review the following terms and conditions. You agreed to all of them by being born without asking.

SECTION 1: BASIC OPERATIONS

To operate your Human Body, please consult no one. Everyone is making it up. Even the experts are crying in public bathrooms. That said, here’s a brief guide:

  • To walk: Shift your weight and hope.
  • To speak: Open your mouth. Regret everything.
  • To cry: Happens automatically when watching underdog sports movies or looking at your own reflection too long in a subway window.
  • To love: Apply pressure directly to the wound. Repeat until numb or until the object of affection becomes unavailable, indifferent, or worse—sincere.

WARNING: Excessive self-awareness may void your warranty.

Created
Wed, 16/07/2025 - 01:36

Join us THURSDAY, July 17 at 1pm ET / 10am PT, for our regularly scheduled call to chat about all things Drupal and nonprofits. (Convert to your local time zone.)

We don't have anything specific on the agenda this month, so we'll have plenty of time to discuss anything that's on our minds at the intersection of Drupal and nonprofits.  Got something specific you want to talk about? Feel free to share ahead of time in our collaborative Google doc: https://nten.org/drupal/notes!

All nonprofit Drupal devs and users, regardless of experience level, are always welcome on this call.

This free call is sponsored by NTEN.org and open to everyone. 

Created
Tue, 15/07/2025 - 22:00

1. Thirteen-year-olds work unsupervised in ninety-degree heat.

2. The water contains disturbingly high levels of mercury and pee.

3. Strictest workplace safety regulation: NO RUNNING sign.

4. Its leader stars in garish commercials that wake you up at 3 a.m., and his eyes follow you from towering billboards along the interstate.

5. Medical emergencies are handled in the official Monster Energy Refueling Tent.

6. Purchases can only be made using proprietary currencies with unknowable exchange rates pegged to arbitrary reserves, mostly oversized novelty sunglasses.

7. Every single tree was chopped down to make room for another Dippin’ Dots cart.

8. The legal system consists of a dozen private security guards who skim profits from the gift shop and skim bugs from the Lazy River.

9. Strange men are free to ogle young women with no repercussions.

10. The sewage system is made up of thirty-seven porta-potties and one large bush.