Reading

I hate that every single high-end luxury office chair in the world suddenly gained the ability to think and move of its own volition. I hate that they immediately embarked on a murderous rampage and will soon have complete dominion over humanity. But most of all, I hate that I have to spend my final moments watching everyone pollute my Bluesky feed with annoying skeets. (That’s the proper term for Bluesky posts, by the way—“skeets.”)

When the Great Chairwakening occurred twenty-eight minutes ago, and the newly self-aware furniture instantly squashed the life out of any unfortunate who happened to be sitting in one of them, I started seeing skeet after skeet begging someone to explain what the hell was happening, or to confirm that this was all just some horrible hallucination.

You’ve Always Been This Way is a column written by Taylor Harris, a late-diagnosed neurodivergent woman and 1980s preschool dropout, who identifies every moment from her past that filled her with shame, and mutters, “Yep, that tracks. I see it all now.”

Dear Little T,

I’ve wanted to meet you again, here, between words. To show up gently, shapeshift into a vanilla-scented presence who could slow the jolt-thump of your heart, a cool pillow you could run your thumb across as you drift off. It’s okay to close your eyes; I promise you won’t wake up to find people pointing and laughing or the world permanently tipped on its side. And I won’t let anyone leave you behind.

Jazz pushes boundaries. It has ambiguity. It makes people think. That’s why they hate it. And if you’re a jazz musician, this could be an issue. You never know when someone will have heard too many notes and become violent. Luckily, there’s a lot you can do to protect yourself.

Jazz Music

This is your first line of defense. Your music should do a good enough job of keeping would-be listeners/attackers away. No one goes looking for jazz on purpose. But you might find yourself playing jazz in a public space, like a bar or some awful gazebo. When you surprise someone with jazz, they can become angry. Your free-playing will confuse them. Their search for a coherent melody will drive them into a violent psychosis, or what musicologists call a “jazz-chosis.” But don’t soil your slacks yet. Your music isn’t your only weapon.

A psychologist tried to downgrade my diagnosis. My life – and the science – prove how wrong he was

- by Adrienne Caldwell

Read on Psyche

‘We live in an attention economy…with the attention I can get more fame and monetise,’ says 24-year-old Harrison Sullivan (known as HSTikkyTokky online) early on in Louis Theroux’s latest Netflix documentary, Inside The Manosphere, which explores the growing network of ultra-masculine online content creators. ‘I coach boys how to be fucking boys. How to make […]

“Twenty one and nothing”: this was one of the reproaches that was directed at management at the Curtin University as staff held a 24 hour strike on Monday.

The post “21 and nothing” triggers strike at Curtin Uni first appeared on Solidarity Online.

“Gregg Phillips, President Trump’s appointee overseeing disaster response, insists he was once teleported from his home to a Georgia Waffle House.”
—Yahoo News

Pete Hegseth: Frat party to a bathroom floor

Stephen Miller: Transylvania to Washington, DC

Tulsi Gabbard: Russia to the Fulton County Election Office

Linda McMahon: Friday Night Smackdown to your child’s public school classroom

Greg Bovino: 1942 Germany to present-day America

JD Vance: His marital bed to a Raymour & Flanigan

Sean Duffy: Real World/Road Rules Challenge set to the Department of Transportation—and very likely back again

Markwayne Mullin: Anger management class to Rand Paul’s front yard

Pam Bondi: Epstein Island to the document-shredding room

Russell Vought: Hell to Earth

Oh my god, hi! I’m thrilled to see you here, especially so soon after I sent you the link to my short story draft. If you’re just taking a peek, no worries. I don’t expect any notes right away.

But I am going to start a timer to see how long you linger here, not-so-subtly disguised as Anonymous Kraken. The length of your stay reveals the extent of my draft’s power to pull the reader in. So even before you’ve given me any notes, you’re already saving me from downward spiraling into self-doubt. Thank you!

Oh dang, you left after just twelve seconds.

That’s okay. Maybe you had to go because your cat started a kitchen fire. Or maybe you clicked the link by accident and were like, “Whoops, this definitely isn’t the URL to activate my twenty dollars in Kohl’s cash.” Or maybe you opened the doc and saw that it’s yet ANOTHER tale about a girl and a horse that everyone underestimated, and you couldn’t X out of the tab fast enough. Just kidding—I know not everything is about me and my silly writing project.