“For this reason, they are strongly recommending that women limit Tylenol use during pregnancy unless medically necessary. That’s, for instance, in cases of extremely high fever, that you feel you can’t tough it out, you can’t do it. I guess there’s that. It’s a small number of cases, I think. But if you can’t tough it out, if you can’t do it, that’s what you’re going to have to do.” — Donald Trump
- - -
Common cold
Gently pinch the bridge of your nose, press on your upper lip, and avoid looking at the sun.
Low-grade fever
Eat a McFlurry in an ice bath full of bleach.
Back pain
We have two words for you: booty massage.
Cramps
Try not complaining. Men get cramps, too, you know.
Migraines
Botox. Despite it being a toxin, we aren’t worried about Botox, because according to science, it makes women hotter.